Hats off to “The Rat Race Trap” (one of my favorite blogs) for the inspiration on this post! The compass? It’s about “finding the right direction.”
Stephen’s post today was about “In defense of laziness,” and he pointed out that different lifestyle choices are just that - choices. For instance, he said, if you enjoy living in a pizza box, beer bottle strewn apartment, but then hook up with a neat freak who wants “more” out of life, chances are you’re going to be miserable, or you’re going to change or …

“Most often, heartbroken people are unknowingly grieving a loss or trauma rooted in childhood or adolescence. That’s because we tend to fall in love with people who remind us of those who care for us – even badly – when we were young and totally vulnerable.” —Martha Beck
I think Martha’s right. But I think we also tend to seek out friends, jobs and employers who also remind us of those who cared for us - even badly - when we were young and vulnerable. I call them shadow relationships …

“Oh Dad, it’s just a little bit of cursing. It’s not bad.” Six heads nodded in agreement. No sex. No nudity. No gore. Just some mild swearing. Maybe the “f” word once or twice. At the head of the table “Dad” listened intently.
“You said it had some really good lessons?” he asked.
I watched as the teen-agers looked at each other - a bit shocked that their conservative father might actually be considering letting them see an “R” rated film.
“Well, I guess you all are old enough now to start thinking …

Two weeks after 10-year old Sarah’s parents told her she couldn’t have a dog Sarah bought a small little collar. It was pink with rhinestones. The rhinestones captured her heart like only rhinestones in the eyes of a tween can. She clipped the price tag off and threw away the receipt.
“You know you can’t return it if you do that,” I said.
“I’m not going to return it,” she said smugly.
A week later she picked out a name.
“I know what you’re up to Sarah,” her mother told her. “And it’s not …