Risk. People ask me about it all the time. I think back to this guy in the photo. He wore a pair of “toe shoes” to the first party at TED Global…odd shoes. Shoes that COULD have been laughed at…indeed were laughed at by some. But lots of people (including me) also thought they were pretty cool….odd, but cool. A couple of women later said, “I loved those shoes but I’d be afraid to wear them anywhere but the beach.” Their fear, it turned out, was looking silly. They were willing to give up comfort and fun to “LOOK” good and fit in with people they didn’t even know. Odd. But not unusual. Did the guy care? No. For him, the reactions were part of the experience and he said so. His comfort was more important than what people thought about him, so it didn’t bother him. He’d learned to put his feelings first, at least when it came to shoes!

Many of us dress, act, talk, work and do things to “Fit in,” rather than risk being laughed at. I “risk” looking silly, foolish, weird every time I tell someone I live in a van. But I don’t care. I like living in a van. It’s fun. It’s hard at times, but I like it. MY perception of my van dwelling is that I’m different, adventurous, and willing to risk. But even people who think it’s cool to live in a van think it’s risky for other reasons.

“Living in your van? Isn’t that a bit - RISKY?” they say.
“What do you mean?” I reply. “What’s risky about it?
“You know, WHAT IF SOMETHING HAPPENS?” they press.
“Like what?”
“Well, what if the van breaks down, or you get sick or hurt, or someone mugs you, or you get lost, or …..” and they usually stop about there.
The fact is, someone can mug me no matter where I live. ANYONE can get mugged, carjacked, or break down. Yes, it’s better to have all those things happen in the town where you live, where you can call a friend or family member to help you, and where you sort of know where the hospital is, but living in a van is not so much more risky than going on vacation. Seriously. On vacation you’re in a strange town, you could get sick, hurt, mugged or break down. You could get lost. All sorts of things COULD happen. Does that keep you from going on vacation? You might decide to avoid areas where the state department has advised travelers NOT to go. You may avoid sketchy parts of town, or take extra precautions for safety…but you don’t NOT go on vacation because of what MIGHT or COULD happen (well, some folks do…but not you!)

Seth Godin talked about risk recently. His point was “apparent risk,” and “actual risk.” He talks about the risk of choosing a chain restaurant over an independent one, or leaving a boring job rather than quitting to start a new venture…and I get his point. I don’t think there’s a set point.

Actual risk, for me, is saying, “I won’t jump off a 25-foot wall because the actual risk is, I will seriously hurt myself. I have done it in the past at age 20-something and survived, but at my age? Nah. I WOULD however, rappel off that same wall at my age.” For others, both of those things would be ACTUAL risks. Apparent risks would be, for some, traveling to Mexico, or joining the Army. Yet, as Seth pointed out, others think that eating at an untested or unknown restaurant is an apparent risk.

“Apparent,” meaning, “What if I fail, or don’t like it, or feel foolish?” Apparent risk is that which we avoid because it could potentially be uncomfortable, embarrassing or aggravating. It is a choice. If I have three hungry kids in the back seat screaming for McDonalds, do I go to McDonalds? Or do I take them to an untested restaurant and teach them the joy of risk taking? Or do I wait until they’re calm and PLAN the lesson about risk and trying new things? Personal choice. Depends on a lot of things - time, your patience, how hungry the kids are…the payoff, the trade-off…

But when I get in the van and point it wherever, there’s always RISK, both apparent and actual. Why do I do it? Because I’m willing to accept the consequences. I’m willing to look and feel foolish because I know that the pain of both passes in time. I’m willing to break down and be inconvenienced because I have AAA and some basic mechanical knowledge and a backup plan. I’m willing to risk what I do because I plan, prepare and trust. I trust myself to be able to figure out what to do and how to deal with it IF it happens (90% of what we fear never happens). I’m willing to risk because, my hair will grow out if the new stylist really screws it up. I keep snacks I like if the new restaurant food sucks and I can’t finish my meal. I think the payoff - finding a new restaurant, town, park, attraction, movie or whatever that I’ll love, far outweighs the potential risk of feeling foolish, going hungry, wasting a couple of hours.

Most of all, I’m willing to walk away. I once went on a “nature hike” with a group. The guide was really, really lame, uninformed, bored….a real jerk. So 15 minutes into it I voiced that to someone else in the group and I walked back to the registration desk. I expressed my dissatisfaction and requested a refund or a ticket to the next hike. I ended up with a great guide who knew his stuff, was funny and had a great time. Later in the afternoon, back at the campground I ran into the folks from the first group and told them what I’d done. They all said they “wished we had your spunk,” and told me I had made the right choice. They suffered through a really bad one hour hike. Lesson? Trust your gut. Leaving meant “risking” - they thought, looking rude…but then thought that I hadn’t really looked rude at all.

“I thought you just felt sick or got ill,” an elderly woman said.

Funny. Often the risk we THINK we see isn’t a risk at all. It’s only our thoughts about how we THINK we’ll LOOK. It’s not a risk at all.

So, you don’t have to move into a van, but do take a risk today. Go to a new restaurant. Drive home from work a different way. See a movie you know nothing about. Start with small risks. Build up. Then go crazy. I think you’ll like it.